What do you enjoy most about writing?
I use to write manual in small note books and it was daily things that is happening to me
the negative and the positive cases but with dates and time til one day I burned them , but in mind and soul I always wanted and document my life journey I even contacted writers to right my story , and things kept happening till it reached to continues circle and same issues I been facing all alone , and it was always me , meanwhile it’s them and human’s behaviors , till I have made a life and took some decisions and signed and agreement with a female figure that was my boss and I thought I have made it , and the next 5 years will be peace but just as I started to feel it , I lost my purpose one of a sudden and was left alone , betrayed , oppressed and the boss that I suppose have put all my hopes on also changed and that is only in few month . And here was the shocking part for me and I said to myself am giving up everything as I’m everything and will walk away from a lot of people . I left where I was living yo unknown left what was making busy work for . Left the entire community as this for was my last energy investment and last trust that I gave and the last money I had .
Trust me from the shock and how people who I suppose to trust , changed and how I invested on a story that faded even months later !!! I was not able to accept any person or situation from the past that I even left a money making career at 42 , and I know if that do not do that brave move this will never end and there is a problem in prospectives as relation ship I even did try with 2 to see where the issue is and still it was me and it was only because I say what I think , I Donot paint , I do not like to be lied on , I never broke a promise , commitment s , and was not able to pretend any case .
I will speak about this in my story and how the last boss and the last relation ( females) made me give up on everything and a career of 22 years just to save myself and understand what went wrong and to fix myself as it’s like no one I have met , either envy me , or I in person can iterate others the way I express myself , the way I have no fear and can look anyone in the eyes , was not even able to keep a friend and since early age I did everything without parent goodness or mentors and these needed to be investigated as eventually no business I tried to do for self worked , jobs where like maximum period of 6 month work then I resign due pressure and no matching . Ect
To cut this short and I have an important message to everyone reading this .
I decently after I left everything and isolated my self got few month . I start to understand who am I ( which for sure not the barter I was doing ) why I am this way and how to move further . And also discovered that the hobby I had can be also a career and started work on that and of course as it’s my passion of now didn’t bring me the income I expect I am very sure it will and in a shorted period that the one I was told it’s mine .
And after this also my mind went back to what I was doing . And writing in small books . As I am was and will be determined to tell my story as it is and how Traumas of childhood and life was and how I survived , this need to be told . And I opened here an account knowing my English is just a mess but I had no fear to be judged here at least is the comment is bad I have the ability not to approve it but in real life a word I say can make 100 hater creat a war against me meanwhile whatever I said is the truth and has no intentions to anything .
And I started writing here freely and I can tell you , I been all over social media dis for long and I never got 20 likes and 100 site visit … and here I got more motivated to maintain and instead of saying what I think , write what I think till I reach my 80k word and story complete and my story and what am going to present is something no writer can talk about , it’s taking of what bad I did which may not be , but hat thoughts use to come in my mind , what fantasies I had what challenges I went through and just as it is .
Now this year if anyone is into the astronomy 🪐 thing . This year was no only a shift for me , and big deacons and big great breaks and losses , as I contacted few old friend just to say hi , and I discovered that they also going through big transitions and some red help .
The message here to all from a person that reached to the give up line many times in life and Stepped back and start all over again , from a person who is doing best to file this experience as 100 percent am sure someone needs it .
If you are in such situation , if you are defeated and feeling lost , if you lost loved once family . Whatever it is , you need to take a quick action by pulling your energy completely out no matter what responsibilities you got , when I have up on everything and left in June this year . Trust me I had nothing but a believe that I need to sit for a while with myself and find out self and how to complete the rest of my life at least with once achievement and one good choice .
What I discovered during 2 month it’s worth all my past life , I found out who am I , what I can do . What o shouldn’t do and how to work on self only (here am talking from a prospective of an artist that can not be with anybody no matter what or relations ) and what’s my best goal . And whatever happened last I forgave myself and all . And now I feel much better and thank you to this app , at least when I write a wrong English ( I speak 4 languages ) no one will discriminate me , if I tell my believes and prospectives no one will call me non believer , when I speak about my self no one would see me as crazy , and when I try to help and be there I was judged and mistreated .
Moral and message you are worth it and no matter what went wrong all you need is to sit with yourself and discover more and know your strength and weakness and I pray for every man on this planet ( no discrimination here please ) and of course women but men suffer silently and must patented strength as being a man is not easy and full of challenges and men mental health is not taken serious just like father day . Just know who ever feeling broken defeated , know that this was not the place you suppose to be nor the job and nor the wife or relation you been inside . Heal yourself and start again it’s worth it . Take an example of me and now am writing freely and daily and proud of my 10 likes it even 1 . And will continue to the goal and accept that truth is not reality and your choice to go back or do the extraordinary and the things you could not do . Life is too short make sure to find happiness and peace . And again I am thankful to this app that it’s a free world and where freedom of speech exist .
Donot forget to forgive my English .

When it’s wind it’s peace
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